PATHETIC!!

If you are a hostelite in college then you must have definitely zapped through many disadvantages. From my eyes I always gauge the cons of MESS food or rather “ewww!” as we call it. There are days when something clicks in the hand of the (master)chef and the dish turns out tastier than the one from Residency or Sheraton. But, others (almost everyday) they are uniquely spoilt. The yuck taste is common, but how bad it is varies each day. BAD. Thats all.

So, once a friend of mine was having this little conversation with her mom. It was more of lamenting though. But all of it was true and the end revealed how pathetic the state of a... well, read on, you’ll know who!.

Friend: Hi amma. What are you doing?

Mom: Nothing much, just now done with cooking dinner. You had yours?

Friend: Errr.. Umm.. Yeah, a little.!

Mom: Why? What’s today?

Friend: Some coloured, powdered rice with chutney (unusual combination anywhere other than coimbatore.)

Mom: Eat well dear, else your stomach will shrink. I warned you about having ulcer already.

Friend: You don’t know how food tastes here amma! (low tone)

Mom: I know, i know. Try adjusting and eat something.

Friend: I will amma, even if it is tolerable. Last few days our mess is totally messed up.

Mom: What happened?

Friend: Some stench hit me when I entered the mess, I wondered what. Could trace it to the kitchen thou’. As I first added rice and kulambu to my platter I din’t know anything. Later when I went near the side dish a big vessel of crushed spinach was OVER cooked and so was the nausea pain.

Sad chef, sad food.

Mom: The whole lot?

Friend: The entire lot. Some girls had the same, without a second choice and ofcourse hunger.

Mom: If nothing is good, then why not just rice with curd. That will subside your stomach for a while.

Friend: Curd ah? Hahahaha. It’s one and only Butter milk, lately it’s water milk. Amma, seriously, for some two days we had too much of water shortage problems. It was bugging and we wondered why. But seeing the butter milk they had exactly told me where all the water had went.

Mom: You drank it?

Friend: Noooo! The reaction my friend gave after a sip, mahn! I’m not even going to take a look at it.

Mom: So anything you eat, it doesn’t have nutrition, else you eat nothing!!

Friend: Nutri... what?

Mom: Hmmm... Atleast milk.

Friend: Hah! Best part. I spilt some milk from my cup yesterday and I learnt science.

Mom: Huh?!

Friend: Yeah, almost half a cup of milk spilt had only few drops of milk on the floor and the rest of the water rolled and dried away(density difference - viscosity). It’s water everywhere except pipes.

Mom: Y’all dont complain to the management?

Friend: Yes we can. By the time they even think of processing, I will have 99% of water in my body.

Mom: (Angry..) What is your Mess Representative doing? Doesn’t she care about all this? She eats the same food right?

Friend: Umm.. Yeah.!

Mom: Talk to her, Else I will. Give her the PHONE!!!!!!

Friend: Yes, Speaking! :P

So is the fate of any mess representative.

Wrote the above true conversation wondering if any HOSTEL in this world has good food. Embrace your mommy’s food.

Hungry,

Swetha Ananthan.